Today’s blog post is going to be a little more personal, but I figured sharing methods to my madness may help anyone else who wants to know how to reset themselves and overcome their current obstacle.
When you are going through a rough patch which could be a breakup, loss of a loved one, stress at work, or any combination of problems you have going on for yourself, sometimes all you want to do is go back and try again.
If we have made it this far in life, we all know we cannot go back. Even though sometimes it feels like that is all you want to do, moving ahead even at a slow pace is what is best for you.
The clean slate and first step forward is what I like to call the “reset”. You can do a reset any time of year, any day of the week, and any time of day. You do not need to wait for a new year, week, or day. Starting your process is the first step to feeling and getting better.
The most important thing to remember is to not pressure yourself. Do not give yourself a time limit and do not be mad at yourself for being down. Healing in any form takes time. Growing and learning take time. You need to be patient with yourself if you ever hope to move forward. Your rate of healing is unique and it is important that you understand and respect it.
I am not a therapist or doctor. The tips I am about to present are tactics that I have found to work on myself. Trying these tips and seeing results is entirely up to the person. Even if my tips do not help you, maybe they will at least set you in the right direction. If you are really down, please talk to someone. I hope my post may help some of you, but others may need to see a doctor to truly find the solutions they deserve.
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How To Reset Yourself
Clear Your Mind
One of the unhealthiest things for you when you are down is to be in your own head. Our thoughts can be our own worst enemy. The first step to “resetting” yourself and planning the rest of your plan forward is to think clearly. If you can set your negative thoughts for even a moment, you will hopefully see a glimmer of hope that will push you in the right direction. There are several ways you can try to clear your head:
· Go Outside: a walk, a hike, go to the park, or even just sit outside on your doorstep. Fresh air and seeing the bigger world around you can wake you up to the endless opportunities surrounding you. This has always been my number one go-to when I am down. Try observing everything around you, look, and listen. This can really help ground you and help clear your mind.
· Listen to Music: this is hit or miss, maybe find a playlist that will not trigger you. Music has always been a great healer, however, we all know that there are songs that can bring us back to a bad memory or feeling. Find or make yourself a playlist with songs that give you hope and motivation. Dancing is also very therapeutic, you do not need to go to a club or join a class. Blast your speaker and dance around your room!
· Yoga and/or Meditation: Meditation is a wonderful skill that I, unfortunately, do not have mastered yet, however, I do frequently attend yoga classes and it is truly good for your soul. I have never left a yoga class feeling worse than when I started. Yoga is beautiful because somedays you may participate in all the positions and movements and somedays you may just lie there and relax and meditate. Find a good instructor and a good environment and give it a try! There are also options to do yoga from the comfort of your own home if that is a better option for you. If you are a Newfoundlander, I recommend Bodhi Hot Yoga!
· Change your Scenery: if you do not have your own car you can always hop on public transportation. If you have the time and money you could even jump on a plane! Maybe you only have enough energy to walk down the road. Anything will do you some good. If you are sitting in your house for 24 hours a day or repeating the same pattern of eating, sleep, and work chances are you are not going to be able to break the sad cycle you are feeling. Breaking a routine that is not helping you can inspire you to think outside the box that you are living in.
Declutter and Let Go
Clean up your life, your living space, your car, your memories, and your social media. Clean it all. An important part of “resetting” yourself involves letting things go.
I am someone who holds on to every little thing because either “it may be useful one day” or “this is a special memory!”. This is not a bad quality to have, but there are some items you need to let go of for your wellness.
I usually start with my living space. I clean and organize all my belongings and donate or dispose of whatever is no good to me. This gets you out of bed, it is productive, and it can serve as a distraction. People joke about feeling like a new person when you clean your room, but it is so true!
As I am cleaning my house, I will find items that remind me of parts of my life that I need to let go of. Although it is hard, I try to get rid of most of these items. Memories are important and there are definitely times in your life that you must remember, however having items that you can regularly see and constantly remind you of a difficult time is not always healthy. I like to keep a shoebox where I store all my little memories. This allows me to hold onto the memories, but to only see it when I feel safe enough to do so. If you do not have the same control or if you believe it is in your best interest to simply ditch these items, then please do so.
Once you have your environment safe and clean, it is time to hit social media. I have never deleted any of my social media apps or accounts to get over a rough patch. If that helps you then do so, but it is possible to use social media in a healthy way.
Never underestimate the block or unfollow button. Seeing something you do not want to see constantly is never going to help you. Blocking, unfollowing, or muting this account or topic will help you escape from seeing it when you use social media.
Part of growing up is learning that you never have to interact with certain people. If someone takes offense to you removing them from your social media that is their problem. It is entirely your call on what you want to see when you use your accounts. I try to keep my following limited to people I actually care about, people who I respect, and accounts that motivate me in any way.
Once you have cleaned up any aspect of your life you can think of, you literally have a clean(er) slate. By letting go of items, memories, and/or people holding you back you have made room for new ones. You are now at the starting line of the rest of your life!
Now that you have a clear head and a clean space to start moving forward it is important that you find inspiration from the right people. The right people can be friends, strangers, celebrities, or even fictional characters! What inspires you completely depends on who you are as a person. How to reset yourself completely depends on having the inspiration and motivation to do it!
I find my inspiration from podcasts, books, movies, and social media. Here are some of my personal tactics for becoming inspired. Of course, there are many more, but these are just to get you thinking about what will inspire you:
· I listen to other people’s success stories which give me hope when I am at my lowest. Successful people were not always successful, most of them failed a lot before they reached where they are. Work in Progress podcast by Sophia Bush is a prime example. Her podcast interviews very successful and respectable people and discusses not only how they reached where they are, but how they are still working on themselves. I always feel motivated and inspired after hearing these stories.
· I use social media to look for travel and activity motivation and sometimes even just uplifting quotes and news that give me a little hope. Of course, I also read other blogs to find the motivation to keep working on my blog. Recently, I slacked on my blog posts and became very discouraged, and considered giving up blogging. After I “reset” myself I found my motivation to keep going and now here we are! Social media can be used healthy if you use it to expand your mind and thoughts. Make sure the accounts you are following make you feel inspired and motivated and not envious and bummed out.
· Watching movies and reading books can also be helpful. Reading books motivates me to work towards writing something as well as inspires me to tackle my reading list. Making plans for the future is a good way to keep yourself going, so I tend to make lists of books I want to read or save up for, and that way I have the motivation to keep going. Movies tend to serve as entertainment and can motivate you in many ways. How often do you watch a movie and say “I would like to do that” or “I want that”. Of course, not everything you see in movies is attainable, but it can help start sparking some goals to set for yourself.
· Spending time with friends and family can also motivate you. These are the people who want to see you succeed and do well for yourself. I know not everyone is lucky enough to have a great support system, but if you are one of the lucky ones you need to take advantage of it. Spending time with friends and family is often the breath of fresh air I need to motivate me to move forward.
Start a Project
Now that you are in a good headspace and have the motivation to move forward in life it is time to pick a project. Projects can be anything. The purpose of picking a project is to start making plans for your future. Working towards something, no matter if it is big or small, is a step in the right direction. Here is a list of some projects you can work on for yourself, do not be afraid to pick more than one, just do not put too much pressure on yourself:
· Start a habit tracker to develop better habits: this is a form of self-care and goal-setting. I often look at Habit Trackers on Pinterest for inspiration.
· Start a new journal: journaling can be very therapeutic or just fun! Invest in a pocket notebook and write in it from time to time. You can even find some journal prompts on Pinterest!
· Create an art project: spark your imagination and get hands-on with an art project!
· Join a group or class: trying something new, honing your skills, and being involved with a social group. You can see this type of project would have several benefits.
· Start a fitness challenge: focusing on your physical help can also work wonders for your mental health. When committing to a fitness-related project make sure you are not having unrealistic expectations and ensure you are not making the project a chore. Working on your fitness can be beneficial if approached in a healthy way.
· Make a reading list: I am an avid reader and I will always recommend the benefits of reading. No matter if you make a list that is 3 books long or 30, any bit of reading will benefit you and hopefully inspire you.
· Volunteer: you can never go wrong helping others and you may even make friends! Just make sure when you make the commitment to volunteer that you are not spreading yourself too thin.
· Make a Vision Board: visualize your goal! Learn how to make one with my step-by-step DIY tutorial here.
· Start a blog: of course I had to throw this suggestion in. Starting a blog has been a really great project for me personally. It allows me to practice writing, make future plans, and meet people from all over the world. If you are unsure if you can fully commit to a blog you can always start small, I had several small blogs before I truly started investing in myself.
As you can see there are a variety of projects for you to choose from and even more than I have listed. What is important is that you make a project for yourself that will keep your train of thought and focus on the present and future. It is time to leave the past where it is. While working towards your project you may deviate or become discouraged, however, it is important that no matter what you continue to move forward.
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